Reflect

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  1. Are you open to receive messages from your unconscious mind?Over this full moon, I have been enjoying some really vivid dreams.

    I believe dreams are a way our subconscious mind can speak to us, so when I remember them, I get really excited because I know my subconscious mind is trying to tell me something important!

    A dream dictionary can be useful, especially if your dream was along the lines of a classic theme like falling, or running late, you can also search online for dream meanings...

    HOWEVER…

    While useful, I think dream dictionary lack the individual essence that our dreams genuinely have.

    So, if you feel the same, I recommend interpreting the message yourself, after all it is your subconscious trying to get through to you!

     

     

    So here is the tool I use to guide me, and I hope it will help you make sense of some of your dreams too…

    1. Write a list of every significant person, place, and object in the dream.

    2. For each of them, write down the first 5 words you associate with them. Don’t think too hard, just let the words pop in, as they may not be what you are expecting! For example, if I saw my dog in my dream, the words that come to mind are unconditional love, protection, warm, sleepy, noisy.

    3. For each person, place and object then add to that list how you felt when they appeared in your dream. It could be any emotion so, maybe anxious, happy, sad, calm.

    4. Then finally, for each person, place and object add what they represent to you. It could be that a memory you associate them with popped in, a scene from a movie, a sensation, emotion, a desire or anything else that comes. This will be specific to you. For example, perhaps there was a key in your dream, and to you that means opening to freedom, for another person that might mean locking something away to keep it hidden, and for someone else anxiety as they always worry about losing keys.

    Now comes the MAGIC….

    As you read through all the words on the page, let the real message from your dream appear.

    This isn’t a literal thing; you will need to trust and tap into your intuition.

    BUT by using the word association you will have tapped into your unconscious, so a new meaning of your dream can emerge that is untainted by your conscious patterns and judgements and what you “think” the dream should or could mean.

    Give it a try!

    I cannot tell you how exciting it is when the penny drops and you understand what you were meant to!

    Dreams are literally your unconscious using what it knows about YOU to give YOU a specific message, which is why this is so powerful.

    Share below what you discovered about your dreams, I would love to hear how you are tapping in on that new level.

    With love,

    Helen xxx

  2. why restI have always struggled to rest. It is like I am programmed to keep doing. And I have the stamina to keep doing which is great, and I sleep like a baby every night, so I never really thought rest was important. In fact, to be honest, I have always thought it was people just being lazy!

    But here is what I realised.

    I was avoiding resting.

    Why?

    Because when we rest, there is space. And in that space, everything you have been avoiding can appear. Truth dawns. And it requires you to trust, be gentle, be still, be selfish, relax, give to yourself. And none of that is easy!

    Rest isn’t switching off and watching TV, it isn’t distraction where you read a book, paint, cook, eat, or listen to music. There is a relationship to meditation, but it isn’t that either, because meditating is focusing, and still counts as doing something.

    No, real rest is the absence of everything.

    When I first started taking rest seriously, I used to always fall asleep. Years of running my nervous system on full alert had me stressed and payback was required. I have gone through periods (years) where I operated effectively on 4-5 hours sleep a night, so long as I was doing daily dynamic yoga practice, it was possible to live a frantic London life on full speed, all the time.

    Having moved to the mountains in Spain, life runs at a different pace, manana manana is a real phenomenon! But believe me when you are addicted to achieving and doing, when you feel like you are wasting your life if you aren’t doing something, a new culture and location isn’t enough to hit the brakes for you. Rest has to be a conscious choice and practice. Especially in the times that we live in now.

    So, what is real rest?

    I looked up a few definitions of rest to understand what I was working towards:

    • Ceasing work or movement in order to relax, sleep, or recover strength.
    • To be placed or supported so as to stay in a specified position.
    • An interval of silence of a specified duration.
    • A bodily state characterized by minimal functional and metabolic activities.
    • A state of motionlessness or inactivity.
    • Relief or freedom, especially from anything that wearies, troubles, or disturbs.
    • A period or interval of inactivity, repose, solitude, or tranquillity
    • Mental or spiritual calm
    • And finally…the repose of death: eternal rest.

    And in those definitions, I realised why I have spent a lifetime avoiding rest.

    It is because when we really rest, we must embrace a void. And it is in that space that your nervous system, if it has been running in fight or flight mode, does not compute what is happening so shuts down (sleep). But with some practice, what rests gives your body and mind is this…

    • A clear undeniable message that you are safe and loved for simply being. Your nervous system actually EXPERIENCES this and KNOWS you are completely safe, perhaps for the first time in your life.
    • In the silence, in the void, after all is said and done, the world keeps turning, and you can be at peace, if you choose it.
    • All of your turbulence, activities thoughts and distractions will in the end mean nothing and you will have yourself, who you are, in whatever state you have chosen for yourself. 

    These are big concepts to allow to settle within your body. If you have been avoiding emotions or thoughts they can come rushing in, and I often found myself leaping up because I remembered something I had to do. Then realised it was just me avoiding again! But as I have practiced resting more often, sometimes taking naps when needed, I have learned to simply stop and rest. And it is a beautiful, soul filling, refreshing experience. 

    So, I encourage you to start taking some rest. Real rest, without guilt. Knowing that it is the tonic your nervous system needs (most of us have fried our circuits).

    Give yourself full permission to rest.

    And not because you deserve it for anything you have done. It is not a treat or a reward.

    It is a valid state of being.

    From its stillness great strength, energy, focus, clarity, health, positivity, appreciation, joy, love, and creativity flows.

    Let me know how you get on. I would love to hear.

    Helen xxx  

     

  3. are you listening to what your body is telling you?
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    As a yoga teacher and experiential healer, I get to see so often how people disconnect from their bodies and emotions. And the main reason? We want to avoid pain. Pain is unpleasant at best, and at worst completely disabling.
     
     
    But what if we could see it differently?
     
     
    What if we saw pain as a message from our body?
     
     
    Can you change your view so that physical pain is the bodies messenger and emotional pain the hearts messenger?
     
    If you can, then the question becomes, “Do you then listen to the messages from your body?”
     
    I am a great believer that our bodies are the key to the magic here on earth. If our experience was only meant to be energetic, spiritual, mental or emotional why bother with this complex piece of machinery?
     
    When you can see the real importance of your physical experience, you begin to understand that part of the game is learning to live in our bodies completely. Having spent decades studying bodies, I began to see patterns, even replicas, take a look around... sometimes it is just undeniable that people are nearly carbon copies of each other physically.
     
     
    Why?
     
     
    It is because we all signed up to have a certain experience in a specific human body type.
     
    Each body type brings its own challenges, living in one means we have a lifetime to get comfortable with the body we have chosen and appreciate it for the challenges and lessons it gives us. And truthfully, it’s not easy!
     
    Each of us has a very specific physical journey within our body, maybe we got injured, got sick, had a baby, had an accident or operation and our bodies changed, sometimes beyond recognition.
     
    We are always living in a state of constantly rebalancing our body, in its current environment and for our chosen lifestyle. And those changes are part of the magic…
     
    I have fallen in love with the way that ancient Ayurvedic teachings, the sister to yoga, describes this very sacred journey to really know our flesh and bones, and more importantly how to get them purring like a well-tuned engine so we feel healthy, happy, sexy and full of the juice of life.
     
    Our job is to embrace what our body is teaching us at every stage.
     
    Our bodies are made of a mixture of the elements of nature: earth, water, fire, air and ether. Each body has a specific proportion of each of those which give us our specific body type and challenges.
     
    For example, I have more earth, water, and fire than I do air and ether. It means I am grounded and have the physical fire to get moving and the endurance to keep going BUT if I don’t move, I get heavy and lethargic very quickly, and build extra fat!
     
    Very different from someone with lots of air and ether who will naturally be lighter, faster, and able to hang out with the fairies more easily than me but will tire more quickly.
     
    What got me excited when I understood this is that, what this means is, no body type is better or worse than another to live in, regardless of what the media says is attractive right now, it is simply an experience.
     
    Maybe this lifetime you are a powerhouse and last lifetime you had the body of a nymph! It is all simply your soul having another experience and learning something else.
     
    So how does this awareness help us?
     
    Firstly, what works for me may well not work for you, in fact if the elemental balance in our bodies is opposite, what I need could be detrimental to you. And this is where listening carefully to what your body needs is the most important health practice you can have.
     
    Many of the basics of Ayurveda teachings are literally about tuning in. Taking time to ask “What does my body need right now?”
     
    Listen to the answer and act on it.
     
    It could be taking time to give it the foods it needs, give it the cleansing, the massage, the rest so it can be its best for you.
     
    And the wonder I always come back to is how well our bodies adapt and repair. I have complete faith in every body on this planet and its ability to heal given the right physical, mental, and emotional environment.
     
    So, what can you do for yourself if you have realized you have disconnected from your body?
     
    • Ask your body “What do you need right now?” and take that action.

    • Write your body a letter, talk to it about all the things you do and don’t like about being in it, the aches, and pains, how it looks and feels. Also write about all the things you are really proud of it for. Appreciate it for everything it has ever done for you…every breath it has taken on your behalf, every step it made without you thinking, every physical reaction that protected you in some way. There is a hell load to discuss and be grateful for.

    • Make your body one promise, something you know you can keep that you will do to remind it and you of the love in your connection. It could be getting a massage regularly, saying something kind every time you catch a glimpse of it in the mirror (this one can be tough, it requires discipline, but it will transform your life!) or that you will listen when it says you are full… watch for your first burp, or a tightness in your stomach and throat – these are the signals no one ever told us are our bodies way of saying “enough thanks”.

    • Meditation is a great way to reconnect. Bringing awareness and attention to areas you avoid most is really beneficial. I love to meditate on the heavy bones in my pelvis for example, or you can take a focused journey from toe to head checking in everywhere looking for what you have ignored so far. You will be amazed what it will tell you.
     
    • Obviously, yoga, which is literally union and mastery in motion, is a fantastic way to open the door to greater body awareness, alignment, strength, flexibility, and healing. If you never tried it give it a go! The hype is there because it works and has done for millennia. And you benefit more the less flexible you are. There is nothing that brings me more joy than a student who was stiff as a board starting who, in only a few short weeks, can touch the toes they never thought they would reach again! 
    And the most important thing you can do is to stop judging your body and turn that corner and start to love it.
     
    Living in a body is only an experience, and it is not you.
     
    It is a representation of the journey you have chosen in this lifetime, so I dare you to reconnect with the choice you made and let me know how you get on.
     
     
    I would love to hear about your own journey with your body and what you have learned so far.
     
    With love,
     
    Helen xxx
     
     
    To experience a yoga class with me, a healing or health coaching session visit https://www.dragonflyhousespain.com/bookings.html

     

     
  4. helen nowHelen+BW+Head+Shot
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
     
    What excites me about my life right now? I get to wake up every day and I feel utterly alive. I live in a place that feels like heaven to me. I am surrounded by nature and the opportunity to live my best, awakened, “in flow” life. It wasn’t always like this though I can promise you!
     
    Rewind 15 years.... I was 3 stone overweight with chronic back pain, unable to run, smoking 30 cigarettes a day, working up to 17 hours a day on a laptop, 6 days a week. I was 30 years old and completely exhausted, barely able to breathe or move. Not really what I had in mind for my life... and I was having suicidal thoughts although I didn’t want to admit it even to myself. So I kept on smiling somehow. I knew I had to change; something was very wrong.
     
    My first big decision was to quit work and go back to school, interior design school to be precise. I was completely terrified but I loved it. And it was a real financial challenge but I squeezed it. I got a puppy, second major life changing decision. Then I found yoga, real yoga and became a disciple to a guru, life turned upside down for a decade. My health, mental, physical, emotional and spiritual improved steadily but I still wasn’t living the free life I wanted.
     
    misty pyramid mountainSo, I traded London for the mountains of southern Spain and committed to building a retreat centre and a new life from scratch for myself (gulp!).
     
    I have lived in near isolation for well over a year now and have been through some of my darkest and brightest days. I have experienced more challenges and bliss than I thought possible. I lived for periods without water and electricity, WIFI and a car. I slept under the stars listening to the sound of the night. I found my courage to keep going, to get up, to find my inner power, not driven by others or the rules of society.
     
    I listened to inside of me; with no one else around I discovered what my energy was for the first time. Living in a country where you don’t speak the language during a world pandemic, 10k from the nearest town certainly gave me the space to separate myself from everything! I finally released all the emotions that were stuck in my body and heart. From that empty space I began to listen and watch. I asked for guidance and started seeing and hearing messages. I had crazy dreams, I started to see energy and auras, spirit guides and ghosts. I listened hard and realised my own spirit guides were arriving one by one, but the greatest moment was knowing god was here with me.
     
    yoga deck at sunriseGoing through these changes alone was confusing but I kept following the signs, I followed the urges and ideas I had to crystal grid the land, and through doing so met new people, asked new questions and new names were given to me. I found myself in an experiential healing process with Mark Goddard and more puzzle pieces began to fall in to place. My past lives, my visions, my conversations with God started to make sense.
     
    I qualified and started to teach yoga to adults and kids. I studied and began to give experiential healing sessions myself and I am creating a magical retreat centre for others to follow me into the wild. I adopted three huge dogs, I am painting again, I dance at random times to music that fills my soul, I sleep deep when I need to. I actually enjoy meditating now; it is more like travelling to other dimensions and I have learned to trust myself to go. I have picked figs, made jam and harvested almonds and olives. I have kept my corporate job going online as a way to pay for the dream of no longer being in the matrix at all and they have loved me and my work more and more as I have evolved.
     
    People ask how I am doing it, and the truth is I don’t really know except I am in love with life again and supported and loved in ways I never felt possible, by spirit, by God, by those I have found on the path.
     
    distance shot of isolated dragonfly house and mountainI still get afraid, I procrastinate, and I eat too much chocolate when I feel unsure BUT I AM ALIVE. And I know I have experienced all this so I can show others how to find their wild self, their freedom, their power and soul.
     
     
     
     
    So, my advice if you really want to change your life is this:
     
    • Be brave. The universe sees it and backs you every time.
    • Get good teachers and guides. Check empowerment is at the heart of their methodology, so you really get to take away what they are teaching.
    • Trust the process and follow your heart, it will never lead you wrong although it will definitely not make sense!
    • Don’t worry if you go backwards, my biggest falls turned out to be some of my biggest leaps forward in the end.
    • As the layers peel off don't be afraid of how sensitive and vulnerable you will feel. Learn to be uncomfortable and on your edge. Step into your feelings and fears, it is the only way through.
    • And more than anything KEEP GOING, every step, keep looking for your answers and don’t worry if they change too. You won’t see the transformation but in time others will.
    I would love to hear what your greatest change has been and what advice would you give to those a few steps behind you?
     
    To join me for a yoga class, health coaching session or even a experiential healing session visit https://www.dragonflyhousespain.com/healing
     
    With Love,
    Helen xxx
  5. Are you getting all the love you need?The path to love, well now where to begin! Obviously, self-love is the ultimate aim but, on the way, there a relationship or two can give us a boost and show us what we lack. “What?!?” I can hear you saying “isn’t that the other way round? Surely, we learn to love ourselves, so our relationships and connections are better?” And yes, that is also true ;0)
     
    But what if you realized the relationship you have with yourself is the most important you will ever have? You talk to yourself inside your mind more than anyone else. You wake up with yourself every day of your life…what do you welcome yourself back to the world each morning with? You are the one who will buy yourself the most clothes, feed yourself the most food, has access to understand every feeling you experience, every memory, thought and sensation. So how can we be open to every relationship we experience as a guide to love? Loving both ourselves and those we draw into our worlds?
     
    Take a moment to recognize the most important relationships you have in your life right now, write their names on a piece of paper. You can include partners, children, parents, siblings, colleagues, friends, neighbours, lovers, pets, and yourself if you like. Take a moment to close your eyes and breathe into each one in turn. Ask yourself these questions: How do I feel when I am around them? What does this relationship mean to me? Can I be myself 100% with this person? If not, how am I showing up? What patterns do I play out with this person? What have I /am I learning from this relationship?
     
    heart little lightsWHAT DO YOU SEE?
     
    Sometimes when we take a moment to really look we see that perhaps we are not showing up as we would like to. Certainly, this was the case for me, and I want to share with you where this realization took me.
     
    During my 9 year discipleship with my guru I chose to abstain from sexual and intimate with relationships completely. Now this might seem extreme, especially as at the start as I was a single woman in my early 30’s certainly not the time according to society you hop off the baby train. I realized I had no respect for sex or men. I was using them both to prop up my lack of self-esteem and was manipulative, jealous and at times destructive to get the attention and love I wanted. By opting out of the whole game, I wanted to better understand my own energy and self before bringing anyone else into my vortex.
     
    It was truthfully an amazing and sometimes very lonely experience. Learning to sustain your energy, to love yourself, to tell yourself all the things you want to hear from someone else, looking into your own eyes and being your own reassurance isn’t easy. And in support of me the universe showed up with no one. Not joking, no one flirted with me, asked for my number or made an inappropriate comment for nearly a decade and I know it was because I just wasn’t in that frequency. Having soaked up that experience I returned to the world of dating around a year ago and wow it has been different with consciousness turned on.
     
    neon concentric hearts
    Firstly, I have found I can be completely open to a whole person, not only how they look. It really is energy I am drawn to. Secondly being me, all of me, still takes courage. The first person I had over for dinner took one look at my magic wand and tarot cards and bolted. My wolf pack has definitely deterred a few suitors as well. But hell, this is me. I have also had the experience of drawing in some pretty dark energy in men, people who have seen my light and wanted to feed on it, but I am strong enough not to get into that kind of dependent, exchange based relationship. I don’t need anything from anyone. But I do want to co-create.
     
     
     
     
     
    I find myself in a funny place where I consider myself single even though there is someone very special in my life right now, and I hope I will always keep my single perspective for this reason:
     
    It means I take responsibility for me wholeheartedly. I don’t’ wait for anyone to love me, I am loved. From the moment I wake up until I lay my head down again. And from this full cup I am both able to give and receive. And it keeps me open to experience what all my relationships bring. I don’t have to cling to them or need them, but I get to enjoy them and learn about sharing my world.
     
    So, I am inviting you today to take a step back from all the relationships in your life and take a look at the gift they are brining you. And appreciate the growth they are triggering in you however painful it might seem. And appreciate yourself for being the only person in a relationship with yourself consistently, day in day out, never wavering.
     
    Make a commitment now to give yourself that one thing you really need to feel loved today and if you are bold enough share it below. I would love to hear.
     
    With love,
    Helen xxx
     
    To find out more about what I am reflecting on, what I am creating and the work I do to help people feel all the love they deserve, visit https://www.casalibelulaespana.com/healing